How did you cheat on the bar exam in Louisiana?
Only don't tell me you're innocent. Because it insults my intelligence and makes me very angry.
In Sicily, women are more dangerous than shotguns.
Dear Dad, you always told me that an honest man has nothing to fear, so I'm trying my best not to be afraid.
Two little mice fell in a bucket of cream. The first mouse quickly gave up and drowned. The second mouse, wouldn't quit. He struggled so hard that eventually he churned that cream into butter and crawled out.
- Hey... You should fold it.
- That note. It's a fake, right? You should fold it.
- It's... It's a note from my mom. I have a doctor's appointment.
- Yeah, but there's no crease in the paper. When your mom hands you a note to miss school, the first thing you do is, you fold it and you put it in your pocket. I mean, if it's real, where's the crease?
Leave the gun. Take the cannoli.